I’m your number one fan
It took me 3 days to come up with a title for this post. It took me even longer trying to think about what to say because really, what else is there to say that you don’t already know? Even when I think you don’t know it, apparently you do. Like that time when we got into trouble with the police in Pangasinan for putting the “hudyo” in the police outpost. You were in Manila at that time and I seriously think you’ve got awesome spies or you’re psychic.
When I was younger, I hated it when people said “You’re just like your mom!” I wanted to be someone else, I wanted to be out of your shadow. I said this because I couldn’t compare to you. How can I? A single mom who worked herself almost to death just to make sure that I got a proper education and all the things you’ve never had. How can I possibly compare to a person who have been promoted several times in a short period of time because she was THAT good? How can I prove myself to be at par with this person when she has not only set the standards of excellence, she has also blown them out of the water? It is too much of a comparison and I felt that I was setting myself up for failure if I tried to go down the path you had walked on. So, I decided to be the exact opposite.
I became an artist.
I made you go to my small time gigs (like that pathetic band gig I had in a very shady seedy part of town, remember?) and you went happily. You talked to the people, you were (and still are) supportive. Anyone you’ve met, they’d go up to me and say “You’re just like your mom!” Wow. Still? So I asked how I was just like you. They said that you’re smart, quirky, funny, fun and hot. I wouldn’t know about the hotness thing but then again, you’re my mother and I get my hotness from you so yeah, I guess I agree with that.
Everything you do is for the family. Not just me and the kids but everyone you consider to be part of our family – friends, co-workers, employees. This is why we have “extended family members” every time we have a family gathering. You purchase groceries for your drivers. You get them diapers and milk for their babies. You bear no “sama ng loob” or “tampo” even if the other person committed a capital offense in your books. You don’t talk to them anymore but you don’t wish them ill either – that’s a whole different story. You even extend this kindness to strangers.
I really wish I can be like you.
I am your number one fan, Mom.
I love you.